ude: Mommy, look, there a squish bug.
Me: Hmm.
Jude: It a stink bug.
Me: Hmm.
Jude: It missing it legs.
Me: Um-hmm.
Jude: Can I pick it up?

Jude: Mommy, I a monster and Mama a monster and Ezra a monster and you a girl. You not a woman, you a girl.
Me: Okay.
Jude: Hey girl, what we havin' for dinner?

Me, reading Frindle: "Unlike some of the younger women teachers, [Mrs. Granger] never wore pants to school."
Ezra: WHAT???

Ezra was in such a good mood yesterday that he opened many conversations with, "Know what I love about ____?" where ____ was usually a gift he'd just received. I just told Jude it was time for lunch, and he said, "Know what I hate about? Lunch."

Ezra: The trains on your shirt glow in the dark. Know how I know that? Because that used to be my shirt, and then I grew out of it, and now it's yours.
Jude: Yeah, I know that. What's yours is mine and what's mine is yours.

Jude: I live on the earth. I live on top of the earth. I live in outer space. And my dogs are aliens.

Me: What's Dragontales about?
Jude: Dragons and kids.
Me: What do they do?
Jude: I don't know.
Me: Is it educational?
Jude: Yeah.
Me: What does it teach you about?
Jude: Dragons.