Jude: I'm fishing. Mmm, this fish is yummy! He's crying. The fish is crying. I eat meat. This a meat store. There the pigs, there the cows, there the chickens, there the...other stuff. I'm gonna buy some meat. I get some pig legs. I get some cow back legs. Cow front legs. Mmmm! I like meat!

Josiah: What I'm wondering is, is the devil just the place where bad people go, or is he some kind of monster too?
Ezra: The devil is a bad fairy.
Josiah: What's a fairy?
Ezra: You know, like the tooth fairy.
...
Ezra: Or, as you call them, angels.

Jude: I have cookie breaf!

In the car.

Ezra: Okay, I finished my book.
Me: Great! When we get home, you can read it to me.
Ezra: Aw, man, really?? I just read the whole thing!
Me: Yeah, but I want to hear you read. I love when you read to me.
Jude: I'm sick of hearing you read.
Ezra: Aw, man.
Me: How about if you read it to me later, around dinner time?
Ezra: Okay. 'Cause my mouth really hurts now from all that reading.

Jude: I don't wanna park down here! I not gonna walk!
Me: Ok, I'll give you a piggyback ride part of the way.
Me: [singing]
Jude: I hate when you sing!
Me: You hate when I sing? If you want a piggyback ride, you might want to be a little nicer.
Jude: Be nicer to who?

Ezra: Mama, can you read cursive?

Me: Do you think everyone will bring a stuffed animal to school today?
Ezra: Probably not everyone. You don't have to--it's a choice. I bet everyone will wear their pajamas, though, because what's better than going to school in your pajamas??